What do I write?
Writing an eulogy or sending a sympathy card to someone whose lost a loved one can be a daunting process.
You don’t want to say anything that will upset them further from the loss of their loved ones.
Below are some ideas that the funeral directors at Affinity Funerals have put together with 20 years of experience.
Where to start
The best way to write a sympathy card is to be genuine & say what you feel. You should send your condolences as soon as you hear the news of the death. Some suggestions are:
- ‘Your mother must have been an amazing woman because her energy and love for people shine through in you’
- ‘Please accept my sympathy for the terrible loss of your father.’
- ‘Our Deepest Sympathy’
- ‘With Deepest Sympathy’
- ‘Our thoughts and prayers are with you’
- ‘He/She lives with us in memory and will for evermore’
Writing an eulogy
Writing an eulogy can be intimidating, and it’s easy to get overwhelmed whilst remembering your loved one. Below are some suggestions as to how you can write an eulogy that will have a lasting impact.
- Keep your eulogy brief enough to say what you need to say; remember most cemeteries/crematoriums have time restrictions. Most funeral services have a 30 minute duration so check with the funeral director before the service begins.
- Always use the deceased’s name. Speak about the unique qualities of that person; you may include family history and important career or personal highlights.
- It is alright to use humour but keep it appropriate – people enjoy hearing about the anecdotes that are part of our lives.
- Be sincere.
- Speak as naturally as possible, just as if talking to one person.
- Consult with family and the celebrant or minister to determine their desires.
- If you become upset when giving a eulogy, take a moment to compose yourself and take a few deep breaths before continuing; others will understand.
- Remember, a eulogy should be a celebration of a person’s life.
Below are some epitah ideas. An epitah is a commemorative inscription on a tomb or mortuary monument about the person buried at the site.
- A friend to many & sadly missed
- Gone from our home but not from our hearts
- Love is eternal
- We will love you always
- With all my love
- Loving memories last forever
- May God be with you & comfort you